Saturday, December 17, 2011

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    The first sign of maturity is the discovery that the volume knob also turns to the left.  ~Jerry M. Wright
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    Dad, you're someone to look up to no matter how tall I've grown.  ~Author Unknown
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    Inside every older person is a younger person wondering what happened.  ~Jennifer Yane
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    Blessed indeed is the man who hears many gentle voices call him father!  ~Lydia M. Child, Philothea: A Romance, 1836
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    Time may be a great healer, but it's a lousy beautician.  ~Author Unknown
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    Time may be a great healer, but it's a lousy beautician.  ~Author Unknown
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    Oh, the comfort, the inexpressible comfort of feeling safe with a person, having neither to weigh thoughts nor measure words, but pouring them all out, just as they are, chaff and grain together, certain that a faithful hand will take and sift them, keep what is worth keeping, and with a breath of kindness blow the rest away.  ~Dinah Craik
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    A father carries pictures where his money used to be.  ~Author Unknown
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    A birthday is just the first day of another 365-day journey around the sun.  Enjoy the trip.  ~Author Unknown
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    A father carries pictures where his money used to be.  ~Author Unknown



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    Never raise your hand to your kids.  It leaves your groin unprotected.  ~Red Buttons
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    We advance in years somewhat in the manner of an invading army in a barren land; the age that we have reached, as the saying goes, we but hold with an outpost, and still keep open communications with the extreme rear and first beginnings of the march.  ~Robert Louis Stevenson, "Virginibus Puerisque II," Virginibus Puerisque, 1881
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    Because time itself is like a spiral, something special happens on your birthday each year:  The same energy that God invested in you at birth is present once again.  ~Menachem Mendel Schneerson
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    Growing old is mandatory; growing up is optional.  ~Chili Davis
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    It would seem that something which means poverty, disorder and violence every single day should be avoided entirely, but the desire to beget children is a natural urge.  ~Phyllis Diller
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    There's something like a line of gold thread running through a man's words when he talks to his daughter, and gradually over the years it gets to be long enough for you to pick up in your hands and weave into a cloth that feels like love itself.  ~John Gregory Brown, Decorations in a Ruined Cemetery, 1994
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    We advance in years somewhat in the manner of an invading army in a barren land; the age that we have reached, as the saying goes, we but hold with an outpost, and still keep open communications with the extreme rear and first beginnings of the march.  ~Robert Louis Stevenson, "Virginibus Puerisque II," Virginibus Puerisque, 1881
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    It kills you to see them grow up.  But I guess it would kill you quicker if they didn't.  ~Barbara Kingsolver, Animal Dreams
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    Time may be a great healer, but it's a lousy beautician.  ~Author Unknown
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    Making the decision to have a child is momentous.  It is to decide forever to have your heart go walking around outside your body.  ~Elizabeth Stone



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    My father used to play with my brother and me in the yard.  Mother would come out and say, "You're tearing up the grass."  "We're not raising grass," Dad would reply.  "We're raising boys."  ~Harmon Killebrew
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    A father is always making his baby into a little woman.  And when she is a woman he turns her back again.  ~Enid Bagnold
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    A father carries pictures where his money used to be.  ~Author Unknown
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    One father is more than a hundred Schoolemasters.  ~George Herbert, Outlandish Proverbs, 1640
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    Father! - to God himself we cannot give a holier name.  ~William Wordsworth
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    I still have a full deck; I just shuffle slower now.  ~Author Unknown
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    Henry James once defined life as that predicament which precedes death, and certainly nobody owes you a debt of honor or gratitude for getting him into that predicament.  But a child does owe his father a debt, if Dad, having gotten him into this peck of trouble, takes off his coat and buckles down to the job of showing his son how best to crash through it.  ~Clarence Budington Kelland
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    I don't care how poor a man is; if he has family, he's rich.  ~M*A*S*H, Colonel Potter
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    Middle age is when your age starts to show around your middle.  ~Bob Hope
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    Birthdays are good for you.  Statistics show that the people who have the most live the longest.  ~Larry Lorenzoni


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    When I was younger, I could remember anything, whether it had happened or not; but my faculties are decaying now and soon I shall be so I cannot remember any but the things that never happened.  It is sad to go to pieces like this but we all have to do it.  ~Mark Twain
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    Inside every older person is a younger person wondering what happened.  ~Jennifer Yane
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    My father used to play with my brother and me in the yard.  Mother would come out and say, "You're tearing up the grass."  "We're not raising grass," Dad would reply.  "We're raising boys."  ~Harmon Killebrew
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    Birthdays are good for you.  Statistics show that the people who have the most live the longest.  ~Larry Lorenzoni
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    Because time itself is like a spiral, something special happens on your birthday each year:  The same energy that God invested in you at birth is present once again.  ~Menachem Mendel Schneerson
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    Father! - to God himself we cannot give a holier name.  ~William Wordsworth
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    We know we're getting old when the only thing we want for our birthday is not to be reminded of it.  ~Author Unknown
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    When I was a boy of fourteen, my father was so ignorant I could hardly stand to have the old man around.  But when I got to be twenty-one, I was astonished at how much he had learned in seven years.  ~Author unknown, commonly attributed to Mark Twain but no evidence has yet been found for this (Thanks, Garson O'Toole!)
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    Never raise your hand to your kids.  It leaves your groin unprotected.  ~Red Buttons
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    A birthday is just the first day of another 365-day journey around the sun.  Enjoy the trip.  ~Author Unknown




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    Making the decision to have a child is momentous.  It is to decide forever to have your heart go walking around outside your body.  ~Elizabeth Stone
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    Thanks to modern medical advances such as antibiotics, nasal spray, and Diet Coke, it has become routine for people in the civilized world to pass the age of 40, sometimes more than once.  ~Dave Barry, "Your Disintegrating Body," Dave Barry Turns 40, 1990
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    Our birthdays are feathers in the broad wing of time.  ~Jean Paul Richter
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    It kills you to see them grow up.  But I guess it would kill you quicker if they didn't.  ~Barbara Kingsolver, Animal Dreams
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    Oh, the comfort, the inexpressible comfort of feeling safe with a person, having neither to weigh thoughts nor measure words, but pouring them all out, just as they are, chaff and grain together, certain that a faithful hand will take and sift them, keep what is worth keeping, and with a breath of kindness blow the rest away.  ~Dinah Craik
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    I still have a full deck; I just shuffle slower now.  ~Author Unknown
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    A birthday is just the first day of another 365-day journey around the sun.  Enjoy the trip.  ~Author Unknown
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    He didn't tell me how to live; he lived, and let me watch him do it.  ~Clarence Budington Kelland
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    I'm sixty years of age.  That's 16 Celsius.  ~George Carlin, Brain Droppings, 1997
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    Spread the diaper in the position of the diamond with you at bat.  Then fold second base down to home and set the baby on the pitcher's mound.  Put first base and third together, bring up home plate and pin the three together.  Of course, in case of rain, you gotta call the game and start all over again.  ~Jimmy Piersal, on how to diaper a baby, 1968



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